Jenna: I hope we have kids someday so they can grow up and I can show them this and they can just be like “man my mom”-
Julien: So, they can emancipate themselves?
i’m convinced that the ice age franchise won’t end until the squirrel that always chases after the nut gets an equally hideous girlfriend with Squirrel Tits™
and eyelashes
no….. No
NO
No you don’t understand, I have this entire developed theory about the Ice Age universe which has been cooking up in my mind and has only be reinforced by the latest 5th installment. Scrat is the god of the Ice age universe. The story began with him and the story will end with him. If there weren’t hints before, in this latest installment, it becomes clear that Scrat’s actions dictate what happens on Earth and to the protagonists. Yes, maybe Scart’s only goal is to get the nut, but his actions SHAPE what happens in the film. If we needed any further proof then may I point out something Buck said in the 5th film along the lines of “we’re 6 mins early! Somebody up there likes us!” That phrase is usually used to refer to a god and in this case it’s used to refer (unknowingly) to scrat!
However, there is an ALTERNATE theory that I have been working on. What if Scart isn’t the god of the ice age universe, but rather, the NUT is? As i have already said, Scart’s actions shape the course of the story but what motivates Scart? That’s right: the nut, it is truly because of the nut that Scart does what he does that leads to the events that take place in the story. This would create an interesting metaphor here. Scrat is chasing the nut like man chases divinity. So when will the Ice Age saga end?? When Scart finally gets the nut for good. When man catches God.
i didnt even read this but im laughing at how many times scrat is typoed as scart
“what motivates Scart? That’s right: the nut” is the funniest fucking string of words I’ve read in my life
But the movie makes a big deal of saying he an incredibly smart eight year old. MENSA- levels of IQ. Some of those traps were ingenious.
One 911 phone call saying ‘Help me.’ All it would have taken for this whole mess to get sorted.
The police come in, take good care of Kevin till the family arrives. Arrest Harry and Marv.
But, no. Kevin chose the dark path of cruel sadism.
Kevin was a Sith
How can anyone both see the Home Alone series, and think gun control will reduce violence?
GIVE👏MINORS👏ACCESS👏TO👏GUNS👏
Let me just come back in defense of Kevin. If Kevin was so smart, he must have known that calling the police would cause his family to get in trouble for leaving him alone at the house. Given Kevin’s other actions in the movie, such as pretending that he was shopping for his mom who was in the car, it seems pretty evident that he took pains to keep adults, even responsible ones, from knowing that he was alone in the house. This shows a distrust of the establishment, and it’s possible that Kevin was even aware (as I was at the age of 8) of the general concept of a CPS investigation. By refusing to call the police, Kevin was acting selflessly to keep his family from being split further. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.
A couple of bandits come to rob some poor eight-year-old’s home and you call him a sadist for taking direct action. If some mofos came and invaded the safety of MY domicile you bet your sweet ass I’d concoct the most brutal means of retaliation imaginable to ensure those bastards never set foot in another home ever again.
Broke: Kevin was a sadist
Woke: Kevin didn’t trust the establishment and didn’t want CPS to investigate his parents
Bespoke: Kevin had a God given right to defend his property
Here for all Kevin McAllister theories
Operation Kevin were premade attacks originally for his shitty family members
😯 I need to watch this again
Lmaoooooooo I forgot all about that
There’s discourse here but I’m too high to read it holy fuuuck
I WAS JAMMING OUT AND THEN HAD TO MAKE IT STOP AND THEN STARTED LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY I’M SO SCARED
It’s actually really hilarious to me how about 1/6 of the people who are reblogging this post only listen to the first couple of seconds and reblog it without listening any further, with no idea what they’ve unleashed upon their bretheren.
who was the fool who was tasked with naming the galaxy and the only adjective they could think of was ‘mmmmmmmmmmmmilky…’
scientist: (gazing up at space) scientist: ……….. it sure is a milky boy
NO
YOU DONT UNDERSTAND
ASTRONOMERS ARE THE SHITTIEST EVER AT NAMING THINGS I KID YOU NOT.
When it came time to name the two theoretical particle types that might be dark matter THEY INTENTIONALLY CHOSE THE NAMES SO THAT THE ACRONYMS WOULD SPELL “WIMPS” AND “MACHOS” I SHIT YOU NOT
THEY ARE FUCKING TERRIBLE AT NAMING ANYTHING
I just listened to a talk by Neil deGrasse Tyson himself LAST NIGHT and he went on about this more than once.
“I’m walking down the street and I’m like ‘ooh pretty rock…’ and some Geologist is like ‘actually, that’s anorthosite feldspar’ and I’m like ‘Nevermind, I don’t want it anymore.’ Any biologists in the audience? [some clapping] Yeah, you know what I’m talking about. The most important molecule in the human body, what did you name it? It has NINE SYLLABLES and it’s so long that even YOU GUYS abbreviate it as ‘DNA’!
But astrophysicists and astronomers? No, man, we call it like we see it. Star made of neutrons? NEUTRON STAR. Small white star? WHITE DWARF. You know that big red spot on Jupiter? Know what we called it? JUPITER’S RED SPOT.”
okay i’m glad you mentioned the biologist nonsense bc their naming methods are the bane of my existence
I see your astrophysicists-are-shit-at-names and raise you Marine-Biologists-Are-Fucking-Maniacs.
See this beautiful creature?
It’s a carnivorous deep-sea sponge that lives off of Easter Island and never sees the light of day, as it’s about 9000 feet down. Those delicate-looking orbs are covered in millions of tiny hooked spines, which latch onto anything unfortunate enough to bump into it, and hold it in place as it is digested alive by the sponge’s skin. Amazing, beautiful and profoundly creepy. They could have given it so many cool names. Could have drawn on mythology (I think Scylla would have been an appropriate reference), the region it was found in, the textured skin, PHAGOCYTOSIS, anything!
Feeling festive this year? How about stirring up a few strange looks with our Scar-Jo Ghandi & Ash Ketchum t-shirts? Oh, wait you’re more on track with Queen Bey & Diva Mariah who both show no mercy with their fierce approach. Nah, you’ve got Drake’s “In My Feeling” stuck in your head and now you’re wondering if Kiki really loves or decides to ride, right? How about catching em’ all before Christmas sets in…
